WHAT IS POSSIBLE RAISING A CHiLD IN A CONTINUUM WAY?

Read this wonderful account of one mom's experience with Continuum Concept parenting. (If you're not familiar with this book and want to learn more about it, click here.)

She originally posted it in a Continuum Concept forum and gave me permission to publish it here. 

I want to share it far and wide because I so want parents to know what's possible when we parent in alignment with children's nature, owning our role as a parent but doing so respectfully, as many tribal societies have done for millennia!

As I tell you over and over, parenting CAN be easy. With the right approach, the right attitude and a little bit of skill.

But don't believe me. Believe Laura. ☺

"My name is Laura Fraticelli and I wrote for a long time in this forum. My son Dario is 11 now and when he was younger this forum supported me in so many ways. I am so extremely grateful for it.

So now, I would love in some way to give back all the connection, inspiration, love and support I got.

For the ones that have young kids I would love you to know that for me raising a child in the continuum way, has been the best “investment” ever that I have done.

When my son was born, I was teaching guitar in a school. I was supposed to go back teaching after 4 months but as I couldn’t leave him more than 30 mins alone, as he would cry really desperately, I couldn’t leave him not even with his father. So I decided to stop teaching and became the manager of the guitar duo we had with the father of my son.

I felt that I could give up teaching but not playing concerts. So, since he was 6 months, I would bring Dario to the concert with a babysitter he knew, nurse him till I would go on the stage for 20 mins, then there was a break and I would nurse him again in my concert dress (that was a bit tricky sometimes ;), and I would play another 20 mins.

When he was 1.5, we got our first USA tour and now I got very worried as we had to get new babysitters every concert we went. So, I contacted Eliane Sainte-Marie of Parenting for Wholeness for a session. 

She was truly amazing. She didn’t make me feel bad in any way that I had to leave my son with somebody he didn’t know. And she had an amazing plan for me!

She told me that I could create the same routine for every concert so he will feel safe with the routine even if the person taking care of him was different.

So, every concert we brought Dario to the venue and we would ask the babysitter to come one hour earlier and we would buy him pizza and he would watch Dora! And that really worked! It was really amazing.

Also, really connecting with Eliane’s work made me understand so deeply that Dario was going to feel whatever I was feeling so if I would align with the travelling, he would feel happy too.

This together with talking once with Scott Noelle and asking him: "Do you think I am selfish that I take him everywhere with us?" And he replied: “No! He will be a citizen of the world”!!

We started travelling all over the world. His father didn’t drive so I drove, nursed and played the concerts too. Dario would sleep, and breastfeed in trains, airplanes, restaurants, bars, guitar festivals. And he adored to travel (still does!)

Because, I completely aligned with this life and the continuum way, knowing that it was a wonderful thing for him, everything flowed. He would go to bed late but then fall asleep at the right time in the car, we didn’t have any routines, but everything flowed and worked out so well.

And the other thing that made this life possible is that I studied the work of Eliane so in detail and did the Clean Parenting Program with her.

Before doing her program if Dario would want something, he would shout so loud that me and his dad just gave it to him, so he would stop shouting…

But after Eliane, I learned to be a benevolent leader and be so clear so Dario “behaved” always so well, but also because I learned to be really on his team.

For me the most, most important thing was that his sense of self stay as intact as possible. So, if I would have to correct him about something I always did it in a way without making him bad with himself.

​And I really believe that this is why he “behaved” so well.

For example, when he was around 3,5 we stayed in a very posh house in Florida with a private beach, etc. The house was full of very, very expensive art, that Dario could reach but he could really understand what was expected from him.

Many times, we were hosted by the concert organizers who were very conservative and also had delicate rich houses and Dario behaved like a gentleman. Sometimes we stayed with friends’ musicians who swore and were rough and Dario would become wild and funny and adapt to their energy.

We had sooo much fun travelling, and he got to know so many places and interact with sooo many people.

I would literally be in a guitar festival at 2 am in the morning chatting with people (without drinking,) wearing Dario while he was sleeping and people would come and say to me: "Wow! I didn’t know you could do this with a baby.”

And in 8 years of travelling, as I was so aligned with it, not once somebody said any negative comment (also about breastfeeding,) the opposite! Everybody adored that we were coming with a kid, and loved to see what is possible. 

He would be in restaurants with us after concerts and whenever he got tired, I would go to a quieter place and breastfeed him and brought him back sleeping and he would sleep in the restaurant. 

Many times, people said: “When he goes to school you will have to stop travelling”, kind of not believing that you could have all that fun with a kid… 

But we found a democratic school that allows us to keep travelling so we would bring homework with us and when we were at home he would go to the school.

And when he was only 3.5 one day when we had a duo concert the babysitter cancelled. And we asked Dario: "If we buy you 10 apps would you sit quiet? Yes!!" He said. So he sat really quiet with his iPad and every time we finished playing a piece he would clap and people thought he was so immensely cute. 

So from then on we didn’t get any more babysitters. He would just sit with his Ipad with educational apps (not gaming). 

And we performed in very important theatres, universities, chamber music series, but I could trust him 100% that he wasn’t going to talk or interrupt, or even get up from his chair! And I knew we could do this because during the Clean Parenting Program I learned to be a benevolent leader. So, I could explain him SO clear and that it was non-negotiable to talk or make noises in a concert. (We played classical guitar which is very delicate.) 

Also because of the continuum way of raising him, he adapted and still does socially so well. As he was with us all the time, he knew what was expected of him in every situation. 

​BRAND NEW!

FREE Continuum Concept Mini Parenting Course!!
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In this course I guide you, using the same powerful process I use in all my programs, in embodying different aspects of the attitude and philosophy which create the incredible presence, attunement, ease and harmony that the Yequana parents have.

​And that I also experienced in my family and have guided thousands of parents in living as well.
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But at the same time, he is super creative and free. Now he is 11 and he does soooo many interesting things. He plays piano, bass and sings in a band in the school. He plays football 5 times a week, he is making his own movies and he also ever wants to do courses together with me from MindValley! Like the Silva Method and Superbrain (a course about learning fast). 

Every day, many times a day I am so immensely grateful that I got to be his mum. 

I feel so grateful, that I found the Continuum Concept book and this amazing community. 

And if you have a little baby, I want to give you all the inspiration to keep being close to her/him. Because I can promise you that raising a kid in this way is the best investment you could ever do for the child and for yourself. Sometimes it can feel like it takes so much time but I can ensure you that in the long run you are even saving time! 

And I wanted to share my favourite article from Eliane and if you still don’t know her work I highly recommend you read her amazing articles and find out about her course. It made my parenting so easy and joyful. 
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I send you lots of love."

Laura Fraticelli, Argentina​

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​If you want my help in applying the Continuum Concept parenting ideals in your family and in experiencing what Laura is,  fill out this questionnaire and the sign up form below, and we'll set up a time to chat to determine the best way to get you there.

I'd LOVE to work with you if we're a good fit! ♥