There's a lot of talk these days about the importance of self-care, especially for mothers. And I couldn't agree more. But it seems to me that there's a little confusion about what self-care really is.
Self-care is not enjoying a weekly bubble bath. It’s not going for pedicures. And it’s not putting your make-up on each morning.
True self-care is having the self-awareness to know what you need in order to be physically, mentally, emotionally and even financially healthy… and then doing what is necessary to actually give yourself what you need!
True self-care is not always easy. But it is always worth the effort.
Maybe it’s setting loving limits with your kids… “Sorry my darling, but no I’m not reading Cat In The Hat another ten times” …because your brain feels like it might just explode if you do!
Maybe it’s asking for what you need from your partner… “please don’t say anything, just hold me while I cry” … because often, our feelings just need to be set free, and nothing more.
Or maybe it’s having a tough conversation with a friend… “I’m really sorry mate, but I don’t have the cash to bail you out this time” …because you value your financial health as much as you value your friendship.
Are you starting to see a pattern here…?
Self-care has more to do with boundaries than bubble baths.
And sometimes those boundaries need to be with ourselves.
Maybe it’s choosing not order to an iced mocha latte with a double shot, whipped cream and sprinkles on top… even though the one your friend just ordered looks and smells frickin amazing… because it’s 4pm and you know you’ll be bouncing off the walls until 3am if you do… and what you really need is a good night’s sleep.
Maybe it’s stepping away from the laptop… because you haven’t had anything to eat or drink for 5 hours, your eyes have started watering, your neck is stiff and you’re dying to pee.
And maybe occasionally, or even once a week, it is telling yourself to put the gym bag down… because what your body really needs right now is to go relax in a hot steamy bubble bath.
Next time you find yourself struggling to do, or even know, what’s necessary to really truly take care of yourself… try to relax, slow down, breathe and pay attention to your body and the small still voice within you... because deep down, you always know what to do... and even though it may not be easy… it will be worth the effort in the end.
So much love,